Author Kenny and Reader Stan
by SomeKindOfRomance
Summary: Stan learns to appreciate SLASH fanfics


Wow, look at me. It's friday night and I feel like a complete loser. I usually hang out with friends but no plans have been made for tonight. I wonder what Kyle's doing. I think i'll call him.

I pick up the phone and dial it, press it up against my ear and wait for the voice of my best friend.

"Hello?" his mother answers the phone.

"Oh hey Mrs. Broflovski, I was just wondering if I could speak to Kyle."

"Sure just one minute." I flinch when I hear her yell "bubby." I mean man she doesn't have to do it right into the phone. The woman wants me deaf, she has it out for me i decide.

"Stan?"

"Oh hey Kyle. Listen I'm not doing anything tonight and I'm really bored. You wanna hang out?"

"Sorry dude. I'm taking Ike to some lame ass movie because ma feels that we need some 'bonding time.'"

"WEAK," we both say in unison.

"Alright well have fun, I guess I'll talk to you later."

"Sure, bye Stan," he says as he hangs up.

"Bye Kyle," i say to the dial tone.

So Kyle's out. There is no way I'm gonna hang out with the fatass tonight, he just came back from KFC. God that boy eats a whole shitload of chicken skin. I'm not gonna be hanging around as he excretes his bowel gasses.

Hmmm.. Kenny. I think I'll give him a call. I haven't hung out with him in a while anyway. I wonder what he's been up to.

I dial Kenny's number and put the phone up to my other ear.. the one Mrs. Broflovski didn't deafen.

"Hey dude," Kenny picks up the phone.

"Hey Ken. You doing anything right now?"

"No not really," he answers. "I'm just on my crappy ass computer."

I chuckle slightly. Kenny does have a very crappy computer. He bought it off of ebay. He had to bus quite a few tables for it.

"I'm just finishing writing something, why don't you come over?"

"OK," I say as I hang up and bolt out the door.

-

"Geez, Kenny sure does live in the intestines of Colorado," I think to myself as I walk up onto his porch. I'm just about to knock, when he answers the door.

"Stan the Man come on in," he greets. Ha I love it when people call me that.

I follow him into his crappy ass room and plunk myself down on his bed.

"Stan I just need to finish typing this, give me 5 minutes."

"What is it?" I implore.

"Oh, uh.. nothing. Just some fanfiction story."

"Cool I didn't know you wrote those. My little Kenny's an author," I mock. He throws a sock at my face. "What's it about?"

"Terrance and Phillip.. Who else?"

"Cool dude, let me read!"

"No Stan!"

I push him out of the way and plop myself down in the chair. My eyes widen when I read what author Kenny has written.

"Dude, you made Terrance and Phillip have sex!"

"I told you not to read it," he crosses his arms.

"Dude this is so wrong.. I mean guy sex... Especially between Terrance and Phillip!"

"Is it?" He looks at me.

"Is it what?"

"Is it so wrong?"

Oh shit. He's walking over to me. If I didn't know any better I'd say he was about to-

"DUDE KENNY, you kissed me!"

"Yes I did. Was it so wrong? Did you like it?"

"Of course not dude!" I yell.

"Let me rephrase that. If that kiss just came from a chick, would you have liked it?"

"Well..." I think for a minute. "It was pretty good, but you aren't a chick Kenny."

"Stan, maybe if I give you a little demonstration, you'll come to appreciate slash fanfiction."

Oh shit he's moving towards me, touching me, lifting off my shirt, carressing my face, kissing me softly.. Hey this isn't so bad. Uhhh there go my pants.

"Kenny," I begin to protest. He gets down on his knees. I close my eyes, what the hell is going on!

"Kenny," I continue, "Please we can't.. ohhh... mmmmm." Suddenly this seems so unbelievable.

He takes his mouth away from my manhood. "We can't what?" he asks.

"Nothing. Continue," I say as I push his face back to where it was just moments ago. "Kenny.. I-I-I.. ohhh yeaaa.. I think I can appreciate it... ohhhhhhhhhh! now. sigh

"Wow that felt pretty good. I think i'm gonna write me some of that slash stuff," I tell Kenny.

"Alright good," he says. "Now just let me finish my damn story and then we can go throw rocks at cars or something."

"Yes Sir!"

END 


End file.
